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New Years... Happy 2013

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I hope 2013 is full of joy.
I hope this new year fulfills your expectations
I hope you grow, evolve and change into the person you want to be
I hope your spirit soars with knowledge and beauty
I hope you feel blessed,
and I hope you always feel thankful.

Thank you, for a beautiful year. I'm looking forward to everything 2013 brings us.

Some thinking aloud

I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, probably over the past six months or so, actually. Thinking about religious thought, philosophy and the nature of everything. Really, it's a mini-religious crisis, much like the one I had at 15 or so when I started really reading that bible everyone swore told me the answer to everything, and yet it told me the opposite of everything I'd been taught. This time is different, I'll admit, but not by much.

I have thought this in circles, spoke to my partner about it, and now I'm going to meander my way through these thoughts and see where I come out. Well, I guess I already know where it's coming out, but I'm curious to see if it ever makes more sense.

I've been Pagan for many years, almost twenty, actually. In that time I've often thought of the God and Goddess as personification of the creative power, and in many ways, the universe itself, rather than persons. I felt that as humans we can't even wrap our h…

Birthday wishes for my daughter

Today me daughter is thirteen.

Normally I'd write a lovingly crafted blog, telling the great things about the person I'm wishing for. Due to family circumstances I can't do that; she has made some very bad choices over the past year, culminating in a three day suspension and other things I'd rather not discuss at this time.

I have literally postponed her birthday. I told her if she continued on this path I'd take it from her, and I have done so-- she will get cake and ice cream some time later. When she stops stealing from me and her brothers, amongst other things, I will be more than happy to celebrate the day with the make-over I promised her four years ago.

My beautiful, smart, funny daughter is 13, and I can't even celebrate that with you.

I can't tell you how much I love her, and how much this is tearing me apart. There just aren't words.

I can't explain how disappointing it is, to see your kid, who you love, do this shit, and know you can'…

I am so sorry... but words are hollow, aren't they?

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Rather than the planned blog, I'm just going to share this photo and say that I am so sorry.

I know words don't mean shit.
I know I can't undo, fix, or make any of it better.
I know I am lucky, and I am thankful for that, every day.

I also know that I'm devastated and cry with the families in Newtown, Connecticut. If I could, I'd undo last Friday in an instant-- and I know I'm not alone.

I wish we didn't have these conversations. I wish this sort of thing was a plot line of a horror movie, or a best-selling thriller novel. the fact that school massacres happen in the US is unconscionable.

I know words fail.
I wish they healed instead.

I wish I had more words.
I'm just so, so sorry



Meandering on the season

I've been away, first in November, because I was attempting to write a slapstick comedy novel. It didn't work out very well. While I tend to enjoy it-- think "Three Stooges"-- I can't write it. So I said, "Fuck it!' and figured I'd give NaNo a try next year. Then I got the brilliant idea to write a Shadowrun inspired novel. I wrote about this a bit the other day.

When I had more writing time, I have to admit I just haven't felt like it. It isn't that I have nothing to say, it more that I'm not sure I wanted to write it, aloud, as it were. Some times thoughts are better only in the mind, and not spoken or written aloud.

Then I thought why not, I mean, this is my blog, and I have, what three, four, readers?-- if you all haven't gotten bored and wandered off to other more green pastures of the interwebz... and I wouldn't blame you one bit.

See, it's Yuletide, Christmas time, the Holiday season.

I fucking hate this time of year. …

NaNo update

OK, so I didn't get my fifty-thousand words, but I did get 47k, and the story is told, so as far as I'm concerned, I win! This is two Novembers in a row that I busted my ass to write, and I feel really good about it. This gives me a lot to think about, however, as I know I can take that mtoivation for a word count and turn it into the novel I have that's perpetually unfinished-- and getting longer and longer and longer!

Now about my novella:
It was supposed to be a comedy, but it turns out I can't write slapstick. So I restarted about the 10th, and write a Shadowrun inspired story. See, I used to run that game-- that means I was the "Dungeon Master" for our gaming group when we played Shadowrun. I always loved the world setting, and that game is fan-fucking-tastic! One of the story arcs I created morphed into this novella. There are a lot of changes, as I reworked it off the outline, as oppoed to what my players did. I can't remember now what they decided…

NaNoWriMo

Well, it's November again. Month of Thanksgiving, turkey, that horrible "Black Friday" and of course, National Novel Writing Month.

I'm NaNo-ing again this year, and so my posting schedule will be much slower. I have the pre-set goal of about 1700 words per day for my novel, and while that doesn't sound like a lot, it can be discouraging, when it's an every day thing, and you have other things to take care of like yard work, and helping kids with homework, and the myriad other things that life throws at you.

This year's NaNo is an anime-style, comedic aliens come to earth adventure. At least, that's what's planned. If you ever played "Teen-agers from Outer Space" then you'll have an idea of what I'm talking about. It's not serious, it's very silly, over the top and farcical. I dont' honestly know how funny it will end up being, because I can't draw, so everything will be written out! And, well, I have a sort of od…

Resources about Hallowe'en lies/misconceptions

Here are a couple very good resources about the urban legends surrounding Hallowe'en. They're not propaganda, and so you won't get lurid tales of baby-eating and sex with Satan. You will get some good links, and a laugh at the silliness masquarading as truth that's often propagated by christian fundementalists this time of year.

It's often considered to be the new year for many neo-pagans; I myself celebrate it as a new year. It's the end of all harvest, and the beginning of the deep winter. The earth sleeps, and we wait for the sun to warm us once more.

When you're out, whether it's to a party, or Trick or Treating with your kids, please be careful. It's dark! I don't want anyone to get run over by a car. Don't listen to the scare-mongers and their "candy is all poison" or "witches will sacrficie your children". Just have fun!

Halloween Error and Lies: or what Fundamentalist Christians don't want you to know about Hal…

Samhain, a holiday!

Hallowe'en is coming, and it is my absolutely favourite holiday. I wrote this up a few years ago, as I was working my way through the Wheel of the Year, and wanted something that I could use to tell the story of Samhain to kids. It's pretty basic, and I left out the bloodier parts of the story. If you like faerie tales, then I encourage you to read the original. It's in Scots-English, and so the spelling is strange to our eyes. Any way you look at it, this week I'll write about Samhain, which is pronounced Sow-an or Sow-ane, not Sam-hane... and for the record, there is no god Sam Hain who witches worship... but I'll get into that one later. 
Enjoy! 
Tam Lin: A story of Samhain

This is a retelling of the Scotts song, the Ballad of Tam Lin. The best copy of the ballad I found was in The English and Scottish Popular Ballads by F. J. Child. The original author of the ballad is unknown.
The retelling is done here to tell the story of Samhain, a holiday of Earth Based reli…

I support the right of first sale...

The letter I sent to Congress and the President, through Demand Progress, (an activist group dedicated to freedom of expression, and an actual open, free internet, rather than a corporate, sanitised one) : We, the undersigned, believe that we should truly own the things that we buy. When Americans purchase legitimate goods, they should be assured that the goods can be resold, given away, and used in any legal manner they see fit. The federal government should support and promote the ability of Americans to own and use these products, not just rent and license them. The government, and this administration, should support ownership rights for the following reasons: 1. Americans must have the right to buy a good, confident in the knowledge that they own it and may use it for any legal purpose. 2. Americans need to be free to buy and sell their legitimate goods in a robust and successful free market. 3. Goods manufactured overseas should not have more legal protection than America…

A Vacation

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This past two weeks, or so, has been a whirlwind around my house. A good whirlwind, but definitely different than my normal "slowly sliding through life" kinda thing.

Early in the morning Wednesday, October 10th, the doorbell rang. I hate doorbells, hate them with a passion! Why, you ask, they just tell you someone's at your door! Well, you know that thing babies do when you startle them? They jump and fling their arms out like they're falling. I have a really bad startle reflex when I'm surprised by things like doorbells. Haunted houses don't phase me, scary movies don't either... but for some reason loud, unexpected noises like doorbells startle the shit out of me! So, I jumped, and answered the door.

It was a guy from the local baseball team for developmentally disabled people. Poor kid, his opening lines were, "You may have heard of me, I'm famous! I was in the paper!"

I asked which one, and quickly said, "Oh, I'm sorry, I read …

Unaffiliated

Trigger Warning: Snark ahead. Lots and lots of it. In fact, this entire entry will be chock-full of all of your daily allowances of snarky, sarcastic wit for the next month. Oh, and it's about religion in America... so yeah, you've been warned!

So, today Pew released their newest religion poll. It's amazing! It's New! It's Improved! We can hardly believe it!

Yes, for the fourth, or fifth time this year, another poll has come out that tells us what we already know: One in Five Americans is religiously unaffiliated...

Now, my husband sent me the CNN link this morning from work. The Slate link, I found myself, as I read news there, too. I was already familiar with the 20% number, because I distinctly remember reading this before-- not that long ago. Where? I can't remember, but I do remember the "1 in 5" and thinking, "huh, that many?"

I want to explore that, though, just a little. What does unaffiliated mean, and why is it really such a big …

Meandering thoughts on prayer

About a month ago, I found this article over at Alternet, "Is Prayer Selfish?" It made me think, and ponder, which is what I want articles to do-- I want to be challenged to think about things, perhaps in ways I have not before. It doesn't always work, of course, because some times, news is just news. But occasionally an article bounces around in my head for awhile, and germinates like a seed. This is one of those times.

I saved the link, to my "Blog List"-- a document I keep on my desktop for interesting links or ideas, things that I'm thinking of writing about. I do this, because there is always so much going on in my head. I don't want to forget something that struck me as odd, or weird, or made me think, "huh, I need to explore that idea a little bit". Most of the time, to be completely frank, the articles make me think of something in a completely different direction-- they are my jumping off points.

This one, is no different.

I don't…