Birthday Wishes for my Husband

Today is my beloved Husband's birthday. I made a "Bumpy cake" for him, and will be making ravioli caprese later. But right now, I want to talk about this man, that I married.
This one shouldn't get me into too much trouble!

He's probably going to be red as a beet if/when he sees this; he's kinda self-effacing, after all. Now, don't get me wrong, he knows he's a good person, and he can get just as arrogant as anyone else-- humanity does often equal arrogance after all.

But for the most part, my husband is the kind of man who doesn't consider himself to be all that important. He just is himself, and "what's so great about that?"

Isn't that how we're supposed to be? I think so, and that streak of humility drew me to him. Finding someone so smart and yet so lacking in self-importance was refreshing-- it still is!

My husband is smart, too. His intelligence is so sexy to me! When he's excited his eyes (normally a golden-green-hazel) get almost emerald, and his voice gets faster. He sometimes talks with his hands, if he's explaining something, but when he notices he seems to stop. His passion about all things automobile makes his eyes shine in a way that is so amazing to me. The way he grasps the inner workings of machines makes me wonder if he's not part of the Martian sect of Omnissiah worshippers, and just hasn't told me yet. [If you don't get that one, just go meander around the Lexicanum for awhile. I never promised this blog wasn't going to full-up of nerdom.]

I met him playing a video game; City of Heroes, to be precise. It was seven years ago, around March or April, and the players who were level 45-50 were having a "Hamidon Raid." This means we were getting together a couple hundred people (yes, literally, some times we had 200 people) and were killing the same thing, at the same time, a gigantic monster named Hamidon.

That pink thing is Hamidon, the grape in the jello salad; the other stuff are called "mitos", they protect that eyeball of death. This screen shot was taken quite a ways back.

Often what would happen is this: a raid wipe. See all those little cartoon bodies laying on the ground? Every one of those is a player-character, and we're all dead... the mitos and Hami got us.



This one gives you an idea of how large that monster was, compared to our characters.












I don't know if his toon is in the raid above, but he probably was. During these raids the whole lot of us would watch tv (It was usually Cartoon Networks' "Teen Titans", actually) and would eat our dinner, and talk while we got ready. A raid could take two hours, from "waiting for everyone" to "oh, shit, we got him!" so we had a lot of time to chat, laugh, crack jokes and generally be mischievious. Considering that the raid consisted of adults, the topics ranged from the mildy dirty, to the filthy, and everyone had fun.

Getting to know your partner as your friend, first, is an amazing thing. You're not on, you don't have your "dating face" in place; your "OMG I hope I don't fuck this up!" radar is off, becuase shit, you're friends, and who really gives a fuck if you've just belched a big one after finishing your Coke? You'll get 8's or 9's is what you'll get, not horrified "Girls don't do that" looks.

That's what friends, do. I learned about his dating life, and he learned about my kids, and how I light saber battled with them, how we all watched "Teen Titans", and other cartoons, and how I wasn't your typical women, how I was the biggest dork on earth, actually. This cemented our friendship, and when I moved to Michigan we maintained email contact for quite awhile.

Then he and I lost touch, and life got busy. My ex and I split up, I went back to school, and eventually I returned to the game. It was fun, I enjoyed it, and I still had friends who played it. I was back about a year and had my friend list open-- I was waiting for someone to log in-- and I saw an unexpected name go "blue". My "friend" Cid Noir had logged in! No one had seen him in forever!

So I sent him a "whisper"-- that's MMO speak for a private IM. "Where in the hell have you been! How are you?!"

And we were off. IM's, telephone calls, emails, a forum chat-box, a bazillion PM's from said forum and of course, more City. We talked our phones dead, talked all night [it was only 10:30, I swear!] and finally decided to get together for dinner. We lived about 2 and half hours away, but that's do-able, really.

We went to the Steak N' Shake and I have to admit, I fell head over heels the moment I looked at him. Now, I'd had this crush on him for awhile-- the "Oh, you're so stupid, he doesn't look at you like that,  hat's wrong with you, you'll fuck up your friendship" kind of crush. You know, the kind where you don't say anything, because you're afraid. I'll have to talk about that dinner another time; suffice it to say, it was perfect.

It took about two weeks before we could articulate what we were both feeling, but it was a good two weeks of talking and laughing and being ourselves.

He's just that way. He accepts everyone, just as they are.

Having a partner like him, who just is, and let's everyone else just be, it's fucking awesome. Someone like me who Is, who doesn't worry about what was, or will be, but just is, today, needs someone to let us be. I know that whole thing is a little weird with the verb tenses, but I also know how it works. I'm sure you do, too.

My husband is a nerd, and I love that about him! We still play games together, in fact, we spent last weekend playing Vindictus, a Korean MMO port with fun combat dynamics.

I've introduced him to Brit-coms; and while he doesn't laugh at a lot of the jokes that have me falling about, he does nod indulgently at me. Our humour doesn't match a lot of the time, and I admit to not getting many things that have him dying of laughter. But his laugh is so nice-- he giggles-- that I don't mind not understanding the joke, it's worth it to hear his laugh. For instance, I don't fine fart jokes the slightest big amusing, I never have-- my husband however, laughed until he cried at Steve Byrne's whole bit on farting. I just sorta sat there, thinking, "Uh huh..."

He doesn't eat his vegetables like he should... and he has this thing for adrenaline that nauseates me. But everyone has to have their flaws. He's also a Detroit Red Wings fan, and that's a pretty big flaw, if you ask me...

Over all, though, he's the best friend anyone could ever ask for. He's loyal, loving and kind. He's thoughtful, smart and logical, but knows when emotions are OK, too. He's everything I could have ever asked for in a life partner. He lets me lose myself in politics, and supports women in every way we need it. He's a feminist, and proud of his eco-friendly life, but always looking to improve it. I've successfully converted him to the hippie-dippy, go-green lifestyle... now if I could just get him to eat more veggies!

Happy Birthday, My Love! I hope today is overflowing with love and this coming year is amazing for you. Thank you for letting me share it with you. I look forward to many, many more!

These two might get me into trouble...

 Honey in his natural habitat...


"Cat, what in the hell are you doing?" This seconds after she head-butted his chin for attention.

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